"We must cultivate our garden"

I think I finally got it tonight, I think it all clicked now. I'm talking about yoga in the broadest sense of the word, far away from the mat.

Maybe it was digging carrots out of my grandparents' garden, getting my hands dirty and unearthing these lovely creations which in turn give us and other living creatures life. Maybe it was re-connecting with my family members and not being such a fucking hermit all the time (I mean, they live right down the road so it's not like I have a viable excuse not to, given that I drive past them every day).
It's those two things alone that mean anything in this miserable existence: being in the presence of those you love and cherish and living within your means, living in harmony with the planet that gives us life.

And it's these two crucially important things I take for granted every day. Well, i don't want to anymore.

I'm not saying I won't go back to my hermit-y ways, because that just seems to be a part of my condition but I can at least poke my head in once in a while; it's not gonna kill me. We're only solitary creatures by choice, ultimately; in some ways, we need that human interaction. It's healthy. It's the original and only true form of social media.

And as for the gardening trip I'm on, well, that's not going away anytime soon. I don't want to advance or evolve anymore if it means losing touch with what makes me human, with where we came from as people. Self-sustainability is the dream but it seems to get further out of touch every day, at least on the global scale.

I may not be able to save the world at large but I can damn sure make it my goal to maintain a rich home-life to retreat to; I can live my dream every day, and that alone gives me hope, gives some purpose and meaning to this whole crazy thing.


Now, as for the time spent on the mat, I think I got that too tonight: It's about that time on the mat, with you and your breath. It's about synchronizing the whole of you with your breath. Mind, body and spirit flowing in one smooth direction. Some days it's just plain torture but when you get it, oh boy... you get it. Well, tonight I got it.

It's serious soul fuel, the best hour of my life in some ways.

Day seven of the five day yoga challenge told me that the challenge is never over, no matter how long you make it and that you never stop learning. As with life, it's a journey, not a destination and I'm just along for the ride.

Post-Existential Uninhabit(at).

  Time is not our enemy friends, it's the perceived importance we've placed on it that is. Indeed, our entire culture would likely crumble into the dirt if suddenly there were no such things as 'time' or 'money' but would it be such a bad thing? What one sees as chaos or anarchy, another views as a return to a more natural order; the way things ought to be.
  We did it to ourselves, though; we always do. A novel idea becomes a crutch, a necessity of every day life but more like a slow cancer, in reality.

  Time ceased to exist long ago, it means nothing now: It's just numbers we stress out over fitting our days around. We make up rules and consequences for not abiding by this, for being "late". How ridiculous! If time, if money, if your precious schedule or the material items you own don't mean a pinch of shit when you're dead, then why should we think any differently of it when we're alive?
  This is our one chance, and we have to waste it slaving away to make money for someone else while all ours is being taken away?

  I normally don't voice my opinion of such things publicly. When I do, I'm already prepared to hear grumbles and scoffs and "that's life". Fuck you. We've forgotten how to live. Worse yet, we've never even been taught how to, we have to find this out later in life once we've blown the better part of it making all the wrong choices or none at all.

  You either decay actively or lethargically: choose wisely. 

  
  I was feeding the fish tonight, and it struck me that this is how life should be, this is as good as it gets and it's really all it's about. We used to build gardens, now we build cities. There used to be farms but now it's apartment complexes. It makes me sad only momentarily. What it makes me is angry. Furious, more accurately, and it should make you feel the same, god dammit.
  Trading resources natural to this Earth we inhabit, that all are entitled to but only the select few own the title to with glorified monopoly money. Ink on paper. It means something because we made it that way. There is no meaning to anything save for what we put on it, and we put meaning to the most meaningless things. 

  Wake up. Count your blessings. If you can do that, it means you're still alive and sucking air and there's still a chance for the whole wretched lot of us. Stop putting the control in someone else's hands and take it for yourself, for us all.